Suffer Strong, by Katherine and Jay Wolf

Since suffering a near-fatal stroke over a decade ago, Katherine Wolf, along with her husband Jay, have been a force for hope, healing, and help for people with disabilities and their families and loved ones.  They tell their story in Hope Heals: A True Story of Overwhelming Loss and Overcoming Love (which you should definitely read).  In their new book, Suffer Strong: How to Survive Anything by Redefining Everything Katherine and Jay continue their story, sharing lessons they have learned as they have walked together through life after the stroke.

Katherine and Jay write with their characteristic humor, honesty, and humility, giving readers a glimpse into their "good hard life" and encouraging us to trust God as we live with our own wheelchairs, actual and invisible.  Katherine writes that, contrary to the old saying that God won't give us more than we can handle, "It seems that God does give us more than we can handle--sometimes much more.  And yet He does this so He can handle it for us and so we can handle it together."  The book--and her life--are testimony to her learning to let God handle it.

Part of trusting God to handle hardship for us is remembering what He has done.  Jay writes that "the word remember is found in the Bible five times as often as the word believe and twice as often as the word trust.  Perhaps, just maybe, God is trying to tell us something! Remember Me.  You already know the end of this story; you just keep forgetting.  So remember Me."  Most of us don't have the daily, tangible reminders that Katherine and Jay live with, but all of us should embrace remembrance.

One big idea from the book that I really like is "post-traumatic growth."  We hear a lot about post-traumatic stress disorder.  The Wolfs embody the idea that "surviving trauma is good, but growing above and beyond trauma is possible."  As Christians, "we have the Holy Spirit of God within us" and we have the example of Jesus, who is "the ultimate post-traumatic growth story."  Spend time with the Wolfs and you will see this idea in action, as they live with grace and gratitude.

On many levels, the Wolfs's marriage is an example for all of us.  They aren't shy about putting their lives on display and honestly talking about the day-to-day struggles to which any married couple can relate.  But their deep mutuality and unity are evident.  Amid the "daily sacrificing of our time, sleep, preferences, and attention for the good of others," Jay writes that "marriage may be the death of me, but it's the birth of we. . . . It's interdependency perpetuating flourishing."

Reading about the Wolfs and hearing their perspectives on life and faith will draw you to trust more deeply in God and his purposes for your life.  Whether your suffering is physical, mental, or spiritual, whatever you're going through, God is for you. "Embracing the lot we're been given is about embracing the God who gives it."  Frustrations, setbacks, and maybe life-altering medical trauma and disability happen.  But no matter what, "if we have a pulse, we have a purpose."  The Wolfs inspire me to embrace the "good hard life" and seek God's purposes daily.